Thursday, November 29, 2012
Starting Over Again...
... But this time with some help from an online trainer. I start the program in 2 days. Tomorrow morning I'm going to the gym. I've missed it but working overtime definitely is nice too. I'll also have to go grocery shopping and get stocked up on wonderful healthy foods like ultra lean meats, veggies and eggs. I've been on a similar meal plan before & I really liked it, I just got out of the habit. I'm really excited about having someone holding me accountable. It's definitely not going to be easy working 12.5 hours and making the time to workout, eat and sleep properly but I'm up for the challenge!
Friday, November 16, 2012
I Worked Out!
I just finished working out! Yeah, it's the first time in a couple of weeks maybe, I'm really not sure. I don't know why I ever go a day without doing it, I really do like to exercise. It did upset my stomach a lot working out but that's my fault for eating all that junk yesterday.
I did my first Turbo Jam workout tonight. After doing Turbo Fire, the slower pace of Turbo Jam kind of bored me a little but I'm definitely going to do it again. It should help me learn some of the difficult moves on Turbo Fire. I highly recommend Debbie Siebers' Slim in 6 to anyone who has the ability to do lots of squats and lunges. She always makes me sweat even during the 25 min workout.
I did my first Turbo Jam workout tonight. After doing Turbo Fire, the slower pace of Turbo Jam kind of bored me a little but I'm definitely going to do it again. It should help me learn some of the difficult moves on Turbo Fire. I highly recommend Debbie Siebers' Slim in 6 to anyone who has the ability to do lots of squats and lunges. She always makes me sweat even during the 25 min workout.
Secret Binge Eating
I woke up feeling miserable this morning and 12 hours later I still feel miserable. Not because I let myself down. I continuously choose to let myself down so I just feel numb to the whole situation. Eating crap has left my digestive track in a horrible state. I literally just feel sick to my stomach.
These are evidence photos of the shameful binge I went on last night. I purposely went to the grocery store to buy copious amounts of junk food to indulge in. Two beers, egg nog, gingerbread Oreos, an assortment of Ghirardelli chocolates, cheese and original Lays potato chips. I really wanted to try the new limited edition dessert Pringles like pumpkin pie or cinnamon and sugar but the display had been moved no where to be found. All of these are items I like or wanted to try but never allow myself to. This is definitely not the first time I've binged. Although normally my binges include ice cream, donuts and sometimes cake. Some binges my boyfriend indulges with me. I think he secretly likes my random binges because he gets to eat stuff we normally never eat. Other binges are completely secret, when no one else is around. It is no wonder I am Skinney-Fat! However it does sometimes amaze me that I'm not overweight. But then again when my clothes get to be way too tight, like they are right now, I do start regulating myself. Any day now highly motivated Elizabeth will wake up ready to take on the world. I just need to find a better copping mechanism for stress and frustration than turning to food and alcohol so she can stay around for good!
These are evidence photos of the shameful binge I went on last night. I purposely went to the grocery store to buy copious amounts of junk food to indulge in. Two beers, egg nog, gingerbread Oreos, an assortment of Ghirardelli chocolates, cheese and original Lays potato chips. I really wanted to try the new limited edition dessert Pringles like pumpkin pie or cinnamon and sugar but the display had been moved no where to be found. All of these are items I like or wanted to try but never allow myself to. This is definitely not the first time I've binged. Although normally my binges include ice cream, donuts and sometimes cake. Some binges my boyfriend indulges with me. I think he secretly likes my random binges because he gets to eat stuff we normally never eat. Other binges are completely secret, when no one else is around. It is no wonder I am Skinney-Fat! However it does sometimes amaze me that I'm not overweight. But then again when my clothes get to be way too tight, like they are right now, I do start regulating myself. Any day now highly motivated Elizabeth will wake up ready to take on the world. I just need to find a better copping mechanism for stress and frustration than turning to food and alcohol so she can stay around for good!
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Looking For Motivation
Lately I've been having a really hard time trying to get back to being motivated to workout and eat healthy. For the last two years I've been riding this emotional roller coaster when it comes to food. Well, that's not exactly true. I've been riding food driven roller coaster for as long as I can remember. When I was in middle school I started playing around with anorexia some. I never became full blown anorexic because there was no way my mom would have allowed that. In high school, I still dabbed back and forth with not eating and eating as little as possible without drawing too much attention to myself. I discover that after not eating for three days straight, I no longer felt hungry. And the only thing I would drink was Diet Coke. I didn't want any calories from beverages at all. Fortunately for me at the time, I never fully commit to anything and my mom always kept the kitchen stocked with Little Debbies and Pringles that were hard to pass up.
Fast forward to two years ago my boyfriend and I started our first round of P90X. My boyfriend was convinced that because we were working out so hard that it wouldn't matter what we ate because we would burn it off anyway. Well after 91 days we were stronger but visually our bodies really didn't look that much different. This has lead to the crazy food roller coaster I've been on the last two years. I've tried counting calories with myfitnesspal.com, which really turned me into a crazy person. For my size and weight I should only be consuming approximately 1,300 calories a day. I tried to follow Jamie Eason's food suggestions for carb cycling. Carb cycling is not for the weak hearted! I was always going over on my carbs and sugar. Who knew carrots have sugar? Not this gal. By the way if you are looking for a great workout program check out Jamie Eason's Live Fit program, it includes daily workouts, meal plans and FREE!
I will start to be on a good roll of working out daily and eating right but it always ends in the same frustrations! My biggest frustration is food choices in my area. There are NO healthy food choices in my area. And most people in my area wouldn't have it any other way. Eating junky food is a must for them. In fact we get made fun of at work a lot for trying to eat healthier. I don't know why eating my natural foods makes us freaks but it does. When it comes to needing a quick meal or eating out with friends sometimes it stresses me out so bad to try to decide the lesser of all evils I decide to not eat at all. Other times when we are eating out with friends, I take on the attitude I don't care about calories or fat, I'm gonna eat whatever I want. Which is definitely no damn good. I should care about myself enough to take care of myself no matter the circumstances. My other main frustration and biggest obstacle is work. I work a physically demanding job 12.5 hours a day, 3 consecutive days in a row. I used to think 4 days off a week, that's awesome. But now I am truly sick and tired of working this schedule. By the time I get home from work it is almost time to go to bed. There is just not enough time on the days I work to come home workout, eat and get enough sleep. Even if I just came home and went straight to sleep, I still would not be getting enough sleep. Something is gonna have to give because until I am off this particular work schedule I will probably never get off this roller coaster I am constantly riding.
For the last couple of weeks I've been dying for some motivation to get back to eating healthy and working out all the time. But it's extremely hard without any support. My boyfriend is not a good motivator. It's just not in him. And I don't have any friends or family who have any desire to live a healthier life. So I just feel completely alone and really a little bit depressed. So I decided to start a blog. I don't have any hopes for anyone to read it but I thought it might help motivate me.
Fast forward to two years ago my boyfriend and I started our first round of P90X. My boyfriend was convinced that because we were working out so hard that it wouldn't matter what we ate because we would burn it off anyway. Well after 91 days we were stronger but visually our bodies really didn't look that much different. This has lead to the crazy food roller coaster I've been on the last two years. I've tried counting calories with myfitnesspal.com, which really turned me into a crazy person. For my size and weight I should only be consuming approximately 1,300 calories a day. I tried to follow Jamie Eason's food suggestions for carb cycling. Carb cycling is not for the weak hearted! I was always going over on my carbs and sugar. Who knew carrots have sugar? Not this gal. By the way if you are looking for a great workout program check out Jamie Eason's Live Fit program, it includes daily workouts, meal plans and FREE!
I will start to be on a good roll of working out daily and eating right but it always ends in the same frustrations! My biggest frustration is food choices in my area. There are NO healthy food choices in my area. And most people in my area wouldn't have it any other way. Eating junky food is a must for them. In fact we get made fun of at work a lot for trying to eat healthier. I don't know why eating my natural foods makes us freaks but it does. When it comes to needing a quick meal or eating out with friends sometimes it stresses me out so bad to try to decide the lesser of all evils I decide to not eat at all. Other times when we are eating out with friends, I take on the attitude I don't care about calories or fat, I'm gonna eat whatever I want. Which is definitely no damn good. I should care about myself enough to take care of myself no matter the circumstances. My other main frustration and biggest obstacle is work. I work a physically demanding job 12.5 hours a day, 3 consecutive days in a row. I used to think 4 days off a week, that's awesome. But now I am truly sick and tired of working this schedule. By the time I get home from work it is almost time to go to bed. There is just not enough time on the days I work to come home workout, eat and get enough sleep. Even if I just came home and went straight to sleep, I still would not be getting enough sleep. Something is gonna have to give because until I am off this particular work schedule I will probably never get off this roller coaster I am constantly riding.
For the last couple of weeks I've been dying for some motivation to get back to eating healthy and working out all the time. But it's extremely hard without any support. My boyfriend is not a good motivator. It's just not in him. And I don't have any friends or family who have any desire to live a healthier life. So I just feel completely alone and really a little bit depressed. So I decided to start a blog. I don't have any hopes for anyone to read it but I thought it might help motivate me.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)